TW Mon journal

[YPPAH]

L'avantage c'est que ma mère ne pourra pas lire.
Il me servira de défouloir, pour évacuer mon impulsivité, ma colère, ma tristesse et parler de bons moments peut être
En gros, je vais raconter ma vie(ou pas)
J'ai mis un trigger warning, on sait jamais... J'écrirai le plus souvent en anglais parce que c'est plus simple pour moi.

 

[YPPAH]

I'm exhausted...
Dear M. , I want you to know I'm trying. I can't manage it. Being normal is so difficult for me...

I don't want to go to soccer anymore. I feel too out of step with everyone else. The girls there don't accept me. I'm probably too ''weirdo'' for them...
They don't like me because what interests me doesn't interest them. And even when I try to seem more normal, I'm just... Boring, apparently.
I'm also sick of being stared at. I can handle not having friends there, but I can't stand being gawked at.
Then when I try to stand up for myself, they say I'm "violent"... Ridiculous.
Just take me back to the little house in the forest. There I had everything to be happy...I miss Aby...

Long story short, I'm not going anymore. I'd rather swim, even alone.

I don't have a personality. You know that.
Or I have several, including yours... or R's, but he understands.

I'm so tired of trying...
At this point, I don't even know who I'm supposed to be anymore.
I do what you tell me? You say I'm copying you. Of course I'm copying you!
Isn't that what you asked?!...
And if i don't do it? You're not happy.
Forced to change personalities every three days. It has to stop.

Sorry I'm not who you want me to be. I tried.